


False Hope

by ohhkirishima



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Break Up, Cheating, Flirty Oikawa Tooru, Hurt No Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Sad Ending, Sad Sugawara Koushi, Toxic Oikawa Tooru, i hate u oikawa, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:00:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29240973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohhkirishima/pseuds/ohhkirishima
Summary: False hope. That’s what killed Sugawara the most. Not the fact that Oikawa broke promises, but the fact that he made them in the first place when he couldn’t even keep them. One minute it was “I love you more than anything,” the next it was “I don’t know if I want us anymore.” Suga wanted himself to so badly believe that Tooru was better. But Oikawa never meant what he said. Oikawa never loved Suga, he only wished he did.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Oikawa Tooru/Sugawara Koushi
Comments: 16
Kudos: 34





	False Hope

**Author's Note:**

> I'm apologizing right now; I am sorry.  
> There is a bit of a makeout scene so if you don't like that, make sure you skip when you see it start to come up!!  
> Shoe, if you're reading this.. you're welcome<3

_ "Hey, cutie.” A smooth, semi-high pitched voice spoke softly into the smaller boy’s ear. The hair on Suga’s neck stood up and his whole body retracted away from the voice. Koushi’s eyes had looked up at the man that had spoken so promptly into a stranger’s ear.  _

_ Suga’s eyes had changed from the narrowed position to a wider expression, his eyebrows raised in surprise.  _

_ “Oikawa? Tooru Oikawa?” Suga mumbled softly to himself as his eyes studied the much larger man in front of him.  _

_ “You remember me,” Oikawa hummed as he leaned up against the wall they stood by. They stood in a hallway that was away from most of the commotion of the party. Seeing that the music was still pretty loud from where they were, they had to speak above both of their normal speaking voices.  _

_ “How could I forget?” Suga rolled his eyes and shoved his hands in the pockets of his black dress pants. His soft amber eyes made his way back up to Tooru who was stood a few feet away from being pushed closer by others walking past them.  _

_ Sugawara had so many questions. Why was Oikawa here? Why was he talking to Suga? Why was he talking at all? What did he want? Suga mentally rolled his eyes trying to come up with the answers.  _

_ Something about Oikawa was stopping Suga from just walking away. Maybe it was the yearning to know what brought the old setter here, to this specific party and what compelled him to stand with this specific Sugawara Koushi. Maybe it was the way Oikawa’s black button-down shirt was open a bit from the top button down. The way his grey, plaid pants that were held up by a black belt hugged his hips so well… how the black jacket that was loosely thrown on looked so phenomenal on the brunette. _

_ Suga had felt like he was in a trance staring at the man. He wasn’t unattractive that’s for sure. He was never unattractive. Suga’s eyes trailed down from Oikawa’s face to his neck and down to his torso. Images flashed through his mind and his heart skipped a beat, his eyes snapping back up to the dark brown ones across from him.  _

_ “Let’s get out of here, yeah?” Oikawa prodded, finding himself reaching up and tucking a piece of silver hair behind Sugawara’s ear. No. That’s precisely what Suga wanted to say. He wanted to push the other away and tell him to get lost. Tooru’s fingers lingered, tracing down Suga’s jaw. He placed his pointer finger under Koushi’s chin, grabbing his chin between his pointer and his thumb, tilting the smaller boy’s head up. _

_ Suga’s face was on fire. What the hell was this boy doing. The two boys’ faces were inches apart at this point and before Suga knew what was happening, he let his pretty little guard down and nodded, letting the pretty setter win. _

“I don’t regret going with you that night. I wanted you. If I’m going to be honest, I had wanted you for a long time.”

_ After it was unlocked, Oikawa had thrown open the door to Suga’s apartment with the hand he had free since the other was holding a smaller hand in the other. As soon as the door was closed, Tooru had backed Sugawara up against the door. Tooru held the other against the door by his hips as he connected his lips to Suga’s.  _

_ Sugawara’s hands ran down Tooru’s chest and his fingers grabbed a hold of the buttons on the black button-up he wore. Suga didn’t know what had come over him, but he found himself fumbling with how fast he was trying to get Oikawa’s shirt unbuttoned. _

_ “Impatient, are we?” Oikawa purred as he pulled his lips away from Suga’s, which caused him to let out a soft whine. Tooru took this opportunity to dip his head down to place soft kisses to the pale skin of Suga’s neck. _

_ “Shut your damn mouth Tooru, I’ll-” Suga muttered as he tilted his head back, being cut off by himself taking in a sharp breath at Oikawa’s actions, “I’ll kick you out right now.” _

_ Tooru pulled his head back from the other’s neck and he lifted his hand, grabbing Suga’s chin and making him look at Tooru, “Do it.” _

_ A fire lit inside of Suga’s stomach and he gulped, immediately swallowing his confidence. Suga’s legs felt weak; like he could keel over. He had felt like dropping to his knees right then and there and he didn’t even care how crazy he sounded. A smirk tugged at the corner of Oikawa’s mouth. _

_ “That’s what I thought. Now.. jump,” Tooru ordered and Koushi immediately did as he was told. Once he jumped, Oikawa caught him, holding him up by placing his hands under his thighs. Sugawara wrapped his arms around Tooru’s neck. _

_ Tooru attached his lips to Suga’s as he carried the smaller boy to his room, their lips never separating.  _

“We started to hang out a lot more after that night. Everything about that night sounds like just a one-night stand but when I woke up in my bed the next morning, you were next to me,” Suga chuckled softly, “And I knew when you just wanted sex, you would be gone before the person you slept with woke up.” 

_ “You know I have to go, Kou,” Oikawa ran the tips of his fingers up and down Sugawara’s bare, pale arm. Suga had his head rested on Tooru’s bare chest, his eyes closed and the blanket pulled up to his chin. Sugawara just hummed softly in response. _

_ It had been almost 7 months since that night of the party. Suga and Oikawa were closer than they ever have been. They started to hang out at each other’s places, sometimes they would just sit and watch movies after classes, sometimes they’d spend the nights sharing kisses across their bodies, whispering how much they wanted each other. _

_ “Just a few more minutes,” Koushi mumbled and tilted his head back to look up at Tooru. The brunette just chuckled before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on Suga’s lips. _

“I think-” Suga sat back in his seat, looking to the right of him to avoid eye contact, “I think it was the false hope. That’s what killed me the most.”

_ “Kou!” Oikawa called out as he closed the door to Suga’s apartment. He hummed in wonder as he slipped off his shoes and then set the plastic bag full of takeout he brought onto the kitchen counter. Soon enough, you could hear soft footsteps and as Oikawa looked over at the entrance to the kitchen, Suga was stood there rubbing his eyes sleepily.  _

_ Sugawara walked over to the man that was leaning against the counter. Suga wrapped his arms around Oikawa and he buried his face in his chest.  _

_ “I’m sorry I’m late, I brought your favorite takeout, love. I figured we could just hang out inside and watch movies. We can watch your favorites again.” Oikawa kissed the top of his head, a soft smile playing on his face.  _

_ They had agreed on every Friday, they would have a date night. They would either go out to eat, go out somewhere or stay inside and do something. Suga loved when they just sat inside and hung out in contrast to going out all the time. Nothing was better than the nights they just cuddled in bed and talked.  _

_ Oikawa had changed since high school. He was still cocky and playful but there was something about him that gave Suga hope. The way Oikawa had been treating him since that night made Sugawara’s heart grow; the size breaking down the walls that guarded him. _

_ Tooru was like a drug that Suga had forever stayed away from throughout highschool.  _

_ But when Sugawara had finally got a hold of the said drug, he was addicted. _

_ Sugawara Koushi had hope in this new Tooru Oikawa, and he didn’t think anything could change that. _

“It’s not the fact that you broke promises, but the fact that you made them in the first place when you couldn’t even keep them.” The small boy sighed and looked down at the table in front of him.

_ “Koushi, you know I’m going to be here forever,” Oikawa gently pet Suga’s hair, the silver-haired boy letting out quiet sobs that were muffled by his face being in Oikawa’s chest. They were sat on Suga’s bed and Koushi was sitting comfortably in Oikawa’s lap. _

_ Suga was no stranger to insecurities. Koushi was one to feel like he was easily replaceable, like what he was doing was never enough but he was also one to keep it to himself. He never opened up to anyone unless you were his best friend or his family. That’s why it had confused Suga why Tooru was so easy to open up to. _

_ But here he was, going on and on to Tooru about how the thoughts of him leaving Suga were eating him alive. Oikawa just let him speak before pulling his boyfriend into his lap, his arms wrapping around Koushi as he placed a soft kiss to the smaller boy’s head.  _

_ “I’m always gonna be here Kou, I promise. I’m not going anywhere.” Oikawa whispered.  _

The silverette threw his head back, letting out a laugh, “I swear one minute it was ‘I love you more than anything,’ the next it was ‘I don’t know if I want us anymore.’”

“Koushi I-” The brunette that sat across from him had started to speak but Suga just lifted his hand, motioning for the other to stop talking.

_ It was 11:00 at night when Tooru had finally shown up to Suga’s apartment. His body ached and his lips were swollen. That dark-haired bastard did not go easy on Oikawa.  _

_ Hopefully, Suga didn’t notice. _

_ Before Oikawa could reach down to grab the doorknob, the door was already slowly opening. A small, tired-looking Sugawara was looking up at the brunette, his eyebrows furrowed in anger.  _

_ “You’re 4 hours late,” Sugawara chided. He was dressed in black slacks and a white button-down shirt, a black-tie swung loosely around his neck. Oikawa mentally chuckled, Suga always needed help tying his tie. It had then dawned on Oikawa; _

_ It was Friday.  _

_ Tooru’s face immediately fell and his cheeks heated up, turning pink. How did he forget? Why did he forget? Suga’s eyes trailed up and down Oikawa’s body and he clenched his fist and his grip on the doorknob tightened. Tooru was all dressed up, ready for the date they were supposed to go on. Suga was embarrassed. Suga just scoffed and opened the door wider for Tooru to come in before walking away from the door. _

_ “Kou- I-” Oikawa stepped inside and closed the door, before grabbing a hold of Suga’s arm.  _

_ Sugawara whipped around, his hand making contact with the taller man’s cheek. His nails gliding off of Tooru’s skin that was bound to leave light scratch marks. Suga already had tears forming at the corner of his eyes, but he didn’t know why he was crying. Tooru let go of Suga’s arm to rub his cheek that started to gain a stinging feeling.  _

_ “Where were you?”  _

_ “I was out, Suga”  _

_ “Where?!” Koushi stomped down his foot on the hard floor. He knew he was throwing a fit but what was he to do? _

_ “I was with Iwa! Iwaizumi! Hajime! Goddamnit Suga- what the hell is your problem?!”  _

_ Suga’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “You and Iwa haven’t spoken for almost a year, what do you mean you were with him?” _

_ Images of Iwa on top of Tooru, kissing down his body flashed into Oikawa’s mind and at that moment he realized what he was doing. Thoughts started to run through his mind and he started to wonder if he should lie to Suga or not.  _

_ Oikawa took a step back and he forced himself to look away, “Nothing, Suga. We were just catching up.” _

_ “Right,” Suga nodded and scoffed, looking at Oikawa’s messily thrown-on outfit; his shirt untucked and his belt missing a couple of loopholes in his pants, “Catching up.” _

Suga’s jaw had started to clench and he looked across to the other male in front of him. “I wanted to so badly believe that you were better, but in doing so, I cut myself short, I lost myself.”

_ It was cold. The bed that Suga slept in was cold. The heat was high, but something was missing. Days and days of his boyfriend always coming over later than he had said he was coming; Suga started to think ‘why is he even coming over at all.’ _

_ As Tooru lay next to Suga, his eyes locked on the boy who had his back facing the brunette. His eyes were prickled with tears, his nose stung, there was a lump in his throat. Suga let out a shaky breath as he tried to wipe away the tears that were starting to form. _

_ Oikawa looked up at the ceiling, taking in a sharp breath, “Koushi I-” _

_ “Shut up,” Suga cut him off quietly, screwing his eyes shut which made tears fall down onto the sheets. He started to shiver even though the cover was pulled up to his chin. He felt cold without Oikawa’s body close to him.  _

_ Suga couldn’t bring himself to look at Tooru though. Tooru knew that Suga knew what was going on. Koushi still held on, his hope for this to be unreal still lit like a small fire in his mind.  _

_ Oikawa just sighed, leaned over to Suga, and placed a kiss on his shoulder before whispering “I love you.” _

_ “Yeah,” Koushi muttered and that was it. _

_ They went to sleep. _

Oikawa never made time for Suga, only found time. 

_ Soon Tooru had stopped coming over when he said he was, blowing off Suga most of the time. Suga still waited in the living room though, every day in case Tooru did show up. Suga knew where he was but he refused to text him to ask if he was coming, always feeling annoying when he did. _

_ He knew he was with Iwaizumi, but Suga could only hope for his boyfriend to walk through that door. _

_ His hope had always got the best of him. _

“You never meant what you said, Oikawa,” Suga mumbled. He pinched the bridge of his nose as he felt it starting to burn. He could feel himself start to cry but he just started to laugh. He slammed his fist on the table. Tears rolled down the face that was trying to hold a smile. Suga looked at Tooru, who had tears streaming down his face.

“You’re not even here.” Suga snorted as he pushed the plate of food in front of him away. He felt sick; his throat was dry and he felt like he was going to throw up. 

“Sugawara!” Tooru pleaded, “I meant everything that I said!” 

Koushi abruptly stood up from his chair, both of his hands face down on the table, “You never loved me…” 

Suga’s head hung low as he let out soft sobs. The man’s body shook and his breathing was unsteady. Koushi felt his throat start to close and he started to choke on his sobs. His eyes were screwed shut. He could feel his heart being crushed inside of his chest. Tooru wasn’t speaking anymore and for once, Suga was happy that he wasn’t hearing him talk. 

Suga looked up at Oikawa, his eyes red and puffed, “You only wished you did.”

But Oikawa wasn’t there. He was never there. 

Tooru was sleeping in someone else’s bed, and Koushi was alone.

Koushi was alone with his false hope.

**Author's Note:**

> In case you're confused; italicized text are flashbacks and regular text is like the present:) Basically, throughout the present text, Suga is talking to Tooru but Tooru isn't actually there, Suga's hope is just making him imagine him. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it!


End file.
